Pain Killers, Lack of Friends and Skin Irritation

Alas! ALAS!!!! Ye Yard Sale Gods giveth the a sunny Saturday morn!!! I think it's been 9 weeks since I last went saling and in that time there's been 5 rainy days, the birthday of Our Lord, the celebration of a new year, my family's trip to Orlando, and my favorite; a trip to the e.r. I could go on from here and tell you about my finds but the hospital visit was just too good to not disclose. So.....after the Great Blizzard of 2011 (a half inch of slush), the kids didn't have school for 3 days. One of those days was my daughter's birthday. We had been planning on having her sleepover that weekend but I feared that we weren't giving enough notice and she would be forced to celebrate with only her brother. That bumped her party to the following weekend even though her brother's birthday party was that Sunday. With no detours that would have been nutty but not impossible. Well!!!! I decided to leave the cleaning portion of my 'to do' list until the last minute and instead I was doing what I love; redecorating! Again, not a problem as I have been known to clean my house under pressure in under forty five minutes. This time, however, I was hanging a picture over my mantle when I couldn't quite get the darn wire to catch on the nail. Annoyed, I grabbed what was close which was a small vanity stool only in my moment of determination I had completely forgotten that I never reattached the seat to the base. As you can imagine, as I leaned forward, the seat flipped over sending my fat ass down into the base. At first I was relieved that I did not break the glass of the antique frame but when I went to step away, I realized I was attached to the metal stool. The legs of the said stool go down into a 'v' and my weight from the fall lodged my toe deep in it's cavern and I couldn't get out! I screamed for my daughter but she was upstairs and could not hear my cries. I was really starting to panic! My legs and hands were shaking and the pain was horrific! The more I tried to pull my foot out, the more I seemed to twist my digit in there! Finally my daughter came downstairs and was able to fetch me my phone. I thought about who to call but the thought of my husband yanking out my little piggy from the jaws of this stool was out of the question. That left 911. Ten minutes later, THREE e.m.t.s showed up (holding back their chuckles) and after about a half hour and several tools, they finally dislodged my throbbing, bloodied toe out of the clutch of the stool. Next thing you know I'm in the emergency room. The toe wasn't broken but I did need a tetanus shot to which I had a reaction to and I had to stay to be 'observed' for 2 more hours. To make a long story a little less long, I made it home just in time to receive 9 eight year olds whose parents will probably never let their children play with my daughter again as I was just a tad loopy from the pain killers. Not to mention I didn't realize there was blood all over my pants until later in the evening. As if this wasn't bad enough, I had to have my son's party the very next day! At least I was able to change and not frighten the moms that their babies could catch something from me. So!!! What was I saying? Oh! So that's what I've been up to! As for this morning.....

Since I hadn't been in so long I almost skipped saling since the low was only 27 degrees. Fortunately, I'm a freak who never sleeps so I thought, "what the heck." And I'm so glad I did! Not that today was a great day but it felt so good just to be back on the horse!

My first stop was probably the hit of the day because I got a great hand knit floral scarf, 2 wooden, carved corbel shelves that will shabitze sooo nicely and 2 great pillow covers that are fantastic and already spruce up my living room! I'm not going to lie to you, they're itchy as hell but do I really need to spend so much time on the couch anyway? Of course not!

My next stop was in a weird warehouse that's trying to be a new flea market but you're not getting me to shell out any big bills at 7 in the morning! Interestingly enough, they had 2 of Jane's old painting that she sold when we had a yard sale here! Such a small circle of junkers 'round these parts!

Next up was at an older lady's apartment who was moving out of the area. She had some good stuff but not priced to my liking. I did get an old 'mixers' recipe book with a great jacket that I can't wait to add to my shit to dust for the next 50 years.

After that, the sons of bitches having the next sale had second thoughts about setting up in 27 degree weather and choose to sleep in. I can't blame them but I think evil thoughts about them none-the-less.

My final port of call was an 'estate' sale so of course they got off on making us wait outside until the last possible minute. They're lucky they sold me an old Pennsylvania 'Dutch' (really German and shortened from 'deutch') dish towel that goes with my apron, place mats and napkins with the same print! I believe now my set is complete. As was my morning! Thank you! Thank you, Yard Sale Gods!!! If I had to wait another week I might have started stealing off neighbors' porches. You have saved me much embarrassment (and legal fees)! Well, I guess I'll go clean. I had hoped to catch a marathon of Keeping up with the Kardashians but I'm worried I'll get a rash from my new pillows. My son's in there now watching Sponge Bob. He hasn't complained of any hives but then again he's in 'that zone'. I'll have to wait for a commercial! Sorry, kid!