Saturday, March 12, 2011

My New Platform, The Asian Invasion and Hypocrisy

I tell you what, if it wasn't for my one decent pop, I would be one testy little grump this morn! I kind of figured I would be off to a slow start since there were only three 7's on my route but mercy! I even added 3 freestyles to my pre-eight agenda but nothin'! When I become president (or I settle for mayor) I will pass a law that if you buy something from Walmart (you should be fined just for that) but under no circumstances should you be allowed to pawn it off to another. Their punishment will be not only a hefty fine (in all singles of course [It's good to be the king!!!]) but a mandatory subscription to Elle Decor magazine or House Beautiful because clearly these poor bastards have no idea what to bring into their homes. Furthermore, all wood from the fake forest will be confiscated as will ANY item made to look like an antique. People!! Why buy a cheesy version of vintage when the real deal is probably cheaper and will typically resell for more than you paid for it? These seem like such obvious rules to live by but are being broken in staggering numbers! I truly fear for the well being of our nation. I can't believe Hollywood hasn't made a disaster epic on how the great U. S. of A. is taken down by the effects of of cheap plastic crap from China! Guys, we can not let them win! repeat after me; 'Walmart is the Enemy'! 'Walmart is the Enemy'!

How do you always get me so off course like this? What the hell was I talking about? Oh, yes. Not one single thing yet. So!

Finally I got to my eights. My first sale was a bust but then number two was a dream! I believe I can still hear the angels singing. Well, it really wasn't that spectacular but let's face it, my standards have gotten very low this winter. You judge for yourself...... I got a great old drop leaf table that needs painting but will be a gem when she's beautified! I got an old stool which needs a little glue and some clamps but a small obstacle (I hope!). I got a great wooden wine rack that has a lot of good detail to paint and shabbitize and my fav of the day.....a super cool vintage camera case. I first thought I would use it for the new camera I keep dreaming I will get any day now but should I continue to be forced to use my daughter's point-and-shoot, I think my new purchase would make a spiffy purse. The leather will only get snazzier as it ages too. A real find!!!

So, after that, I got a fantastic old oak armchair that looks great already in my dining room even though I still need two more chairs with seats I can redo to unify them all in this amazing giraffe fabric that I dream about everyday! It's gonna be hot, baby! ZZZZZZZ!! (No, you won't go to sleep in them but I don't know how to write a sizzle sound. Give me a break! It's still early!)

I went to few more sales that were in danger of hefty fines under the new legislation and of course to protect myself from their poison (and straight up tackiness) I had to decline. So, that's it. All in all a pretty successful outing. I bought some treats for Mama and some goodies to sell. Now I must round up the little people and head to Walmart for milk and provisions. What? Did you think I would pay top dollar for imitation Frosted Flakes? Do you people even know me?!

Monday, March 7, 2011