Saturday, November 19, 2011

Yard Sale Santa, Feeding Tubes and Kitchen Bacteria

I don't know who I was kidding when I told myself last night that I wasn't going to go saling this morning! Sure enough, my innate Saturday morning alarm clock went off in my head just in time for the job!!! And what a day I had!!!

Right from the start I scored a huge (brand new with tag!!!) Sponge Bob Square Pants stuffed toy for a buck!! Thank you, Yard Sale Santa! I also got a new (in box) men's shave cream gift set (you didn't just read that, hubby!) It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas 'round here!

My next sale was part deux to a sale from a few weeks ago that was way over priced but this time they got hip to the laws of saling and I bought a fantastic, very old painting of an angel, a great old (-esque) planter, a bird cage and two gigantic wine glasses that I wish I'd had when I was nursing (....What? Dr. said one glass!!!) all for $8!!! AND they served coffee!!! Way to take yard saling up a notch!

Next up I bought a great old blue tool box, four needlepoint hoops (that I KNOW I wanted last year for a Christmas project but hell if I can remember what) and a super cute old Betty Crocker Party Cookbook that if nothing else has the best illustrations to use for decoupaging. They also had a nice end table but since she wanted $150, I had to pass. Really, people????

Next I went to the most fabulous yard sale ever only problem was that someone else had gotten there just before me! And it was none other than the owner of Thrill of the Hunt!!!! Damn her! She got a fantastic old hall tree (you know the tall thing you put beside your front door for hats and umbrellas), a great old pickle jar, several antique tables....and that's just what I saw the whore loading!!!! Well, I did walk out of there with 50 feet of rope but I'm now weary of using it to replace the rope for my tire swing because it's a natural fiber and even if I double it....I just don't know. Even thrifty Yard Sale Mama can spring for the rope that would prevent her kids from needing a feeding tube. Well, there's a lovely thought!!! Between that and the alcohol abuse while nursing, I should nab Mother of the Decade with no problem!

Ok, next up was a church sale where I scored not one but two butter dishes! This is particularly exciting because now I won't have to yell at my husband for using the dish over and over and over. Babe, that's nasty! I also got rubber boots for my hubby which he has been asking for forever ('s a surprise!), a wooden paper towel holder (dying to be painted) and a whole bag of corn on the cob holders which is great because we had that for dinner last night and we only had five. How the.....?

Wouldn't you know, right around the corner was another impromptu church sale! There I got an old printer's drawer and a bucket of old white porcelain knobs. I have a ton already but for fifty cents??? I had to!

Well, after that I was about to go home but noticed a sale going on in a little shop that closed down. There I got a wonderful old frame, an old watercolor of a farm scene in a great old frame (that I HAVE to keep!!), a painting of chianti on table still life in an equally gorgeous frame and a wooden wall 'thing' that I'll paint and hope to be more creative with my description for resale.

So that's my story! I had one hell of a good day. Can you believe all my new treasures???? Truth be told, though.... I can't stop thinking about that hall tree! I wonder if she has a blog. Bitch is probably all.... 'can you believe my fabulous new hall tree....isn't in wonderful!!!!' Whatever. Might go try to hang myself with my new rope. Watch it snap and I'M the one with the feeding tube! Then you know hubby would NEVER switch out the butter dish! Now you know why he gets rubber boots from a yard sale for Christmas!!